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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

How to Get Your Way By Doing Absolutely Nothing

Bitterness over countless disappointments in people both personally and professionally caused me to be one of those people that believed “If you want a job done right, do it yourself!” When things didn’t turn out right, I constantly justified my wrong actions by denying them and defending them, and placing the blame on everyone else. After all, if you and everyone else has done me this way, or everything always turns out the same, I have to protect my self!

Being in a healthy relationship is teaching me that my way isn’t always the best way, and that, as the saying goes, “you can attract a lot more bees with honey than vinegar”.  Being able to back down for sake of peacemaking, be kind, and consider others before yourself, is a skill that requires a great deal of virtue and strength, and can’t be perceived as weak (unless of course you are allowing someone to blatantly wrong you or abuse you- then run!).

There is great WISDOM in someone who knows how to keep their peace, and be humble. Admitting that you don’t always know what you’re doing, and that you need the support of others, is one of the most respectable, wise, and fruitful things you can do to get your way.

People generally want to be understood. They want to be considered. They want to be respected. They want to be valued. When you can come at someone with a sense of peace, realness, humbleness, and complete understanding, you become charismatic! They will begin to care more about what you think, and you put them in a position where they too must humbly consider their own actions. You will create relationships that in turn respect you, value you, consider you.

 Carrying out your day with an attitude of humility and peace, sincerity and mercy for others weaknesses, will cause there to be more order in your relationships, productivity in business, and fruitfulness all-around.

 “How can you have charisma? Be more concerned about making others feel good about themselves than you are making them feel good about you.”
-Dan Reiland,VP of Leadership Development, INJOY

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.”
James 3:13-18

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